Meat and P'taters

So I said I'd make a more beefy post, and I meant it.

I haven't been keeping on top of things nearly as well as I should be. Work got pretty intense about 3 months ago, and stayed that way for a really long time. I have a body that can't really handle the desk job I have; a lot of RS pain in my hands and wrists, my neck and back get messed up. Between the physical pain (and being unable to avoid it as we were call after call after call) I started getting a lot of spiraling mental health issues including panic attack and severe stress. Not out of the fire yet, but maybe it's cooling off a little...
Not an excuse, but I have at least been keeping my practice in my mind, and keeping up with my "walking meditations" I tend to do when I'm on my morning commute. And...

Guys my reading is caught up.

I've been beyond stressed out, since the very first book (The Norse Mythology monstrosity) took me twice as long as it should have, that I'd be in full blown panic crunch mode by now.

And then I blasted my way through The Practical Heathen's Guide to Asatru like a goddamn space cannon. And now, here we are, the trailing end of month five, and I'm maybe half an hour away from finishing book five, Witch: A Magickal Journey by Fiona Horne.

I wanted to touch base a bit more in-depth on my feelings about Practical Heathen. I went into it excited, since I was finally going to get the modern pagan/religious/spiritual perspective on the myths I read about in my first book.

First off, I was surprised at the number of little things I found I was reading about that have already been some part of my practice or belief, how many things "clicked". One of the bigger ones was the concept of animism - everything has a spirit, a soul, an energy. She refers to them as "wights", that everything alive or otherwise is a "wight". I've always felt this, and this has been a huge factor in my belief system since I considered myself pagan, and even a bit before I came around to that. Even manmade things and electronics. I tend to personify electronics I use a lot--my computer, my camera, my phone, the xbox--and get pretty attached to them. I honestly feel a lot of these objects absorb the energy of their makers, or their owners--a computer, like any tool, takes on some of the one who uses it. I've always had a stupid amount of luck with (most) of my electronics. I tend to get a lot longer out of them than is logical (says the gal who used to work in computer retail and knows how often things break down.) and usually I will try to fix them myself if me an' google can figure out how.

I really really liked learning about blots, and sumbles. She gave good examples of really simple solo rites, and more involved ones for groups or certain occasions. I'm a pretty firm believer that if your intention is in the right place, the only "wrong" way to do something is "half-assed", but it's nice to have a starting point for communication with the gods.

She was also very open-minded in acknowledging that certain heathens do things differently or that something is how "most" heathens do it, implying "not all". One review I read, and agreed with, is she was very fair in her discussion of Loki, actually devoting a small "annex" to the issue posed by his role in the mythology and whether or not he is worshipped. I knew there were heathens who do not like Loki, and there were "Lokeans" but didn't really understand the nature of the division or what the "norm" was. I feel like I sort of do now.

Overall I was a big fan too of her writing style. It tended towards more relaxed and informal in tone, which I seem to absorb from better than the more "mystical" or stuffy writing style. She threw in a bit of light humor and it was an easy, engaging read. I may look into reading Essential Asatru by Diana Paxson as my last book, to compare, but I haven't decided yet. 

On to Fiona Horne...

This book is pretty awesome. It's lightweight and kind of irreverent in the writing style, which seems to be my preference (see above) as it feels more conversational than academic or fluffy. I've openly giggled a bit more than once.

I'm not necessarily learning a lot about the craft in general that I wasn't already familiar with, though there are a TON of really good ritual and spell ideas in this book which I am absorbing into my mental arsenal of ideas for things. It makes the reading sometimes a bit awkward, as my impatient nature wants me to skip over spells for things I have no interest in (ie. a love spell) but I've been forcing myself to read this cover to cover, since even in a spell I have no specific use for, I may get ideas for something I WILL use.

One thing she seems to refer a lot to is the use of spoken words/phrases during spell work, something I've always had a hard time doing. My most powerful and effective spellwork has always had a spoken component, but I always feel silly saying things out loud. It's something I'm slowly trying to get over, as I think that it helps me focus a lot. She also talks a lot about using an athame. The athame has always been a trouble tool for me. I'm on my third. I'm always super enthused about them when I get it, but my enthusiasm always seems to taper off, like there's something that doesn't quite... fit. We'll see how number 3 does. I did put in a message to a local blacksmith about making a custom blade, which I'd fit my own handle to. I'd have to save up, but it may well be worth it--to have something crafted specifically for me, that I can then "finish" myself might make it more "mine".

I will get some photos soon, of my staff (which really does exist honest) and my altar with its lovely new cloth, and my crazy balcony garden.

Happy soon-to-be-Lughnasadh!